Rule of Three

Two weeks is entirely too long. On this, Doc and I agree.

But it was worth the wait!

I'm so tired and worn out and my body is delightfully achy in places I didn't know could ache in the way that they do that I am beyond satisfied. I'm also looking forward to our next date.

So much happened this weekend! I can't even begin to recall it all.

Doc made dinner for me. Enchiladas, black beans, margaritas. I brought margarita bars for dessert/late-night-post-sex snacking. The enchiladas were the BEST enchiladas I've ever eaten. Delightfully fresh and spicy. The black beans were fantastic. The margaritas Doc makes are always beyond compare.

Then, there was sex. Really good sex. Sex without a condom for the first time in my life.

It started with Doc going down on me, but after just a few minutes, I stopped him. "I'm sorry," I said. "It feels so good, but it's been two weeks and I'm impatient to have you inside of me!"

Doc was great about it. He moved up my body, kissing me as he entered me.

I love looking at Doc while we fuck. It's the only thing about him taking me from behind that I do not enjoy.

But this time, face to face, Doc using slower, more careful thrusts, I looked up at him and remarked on the difference between sex with a condom and sex without. "It feels better," I said. "It's also scarier. I feel more naked," I told him. Which is ridiculous because I'm usually naked or very close to and Doc is the one who is literally more naked without the condom. "I feel more emotionally naked," I said.

And that is scary for me. But it's also okay, because I know that I am safe.

At some point, we took a break, had a snack, started again.

Saturday morning, I woke up and pestered Doc for sex again. "Come over here," he commanded. I rolled over, on my knees, ass in the air, face on the mattress. "No," Doc said, a hint of humor in his voice. "I want you to straddle me."

We'd tried this once before, and I was a bit uncoordinated. This time, I was ready. It was amazing. Once we were done, Doc and I got up. I showered, he made breakfast. He showered. Then, we ran errands. Doc bought cheese and apples and crackers and some household staples he was short on.

After we returned to his place, he prepped a salad for us as I sliced an apple and some of the cheeses. We both tried Iberico cheese for the first time. It's a blend of cow, goat, and sheep milks. And it's DELICIOUS!

We were both quite tired and lay down for an afternoon nap. I had intended only to rest for a bit. About an hour into the nap, having mostly just lay in the dark and quiet bedroom, I was feeling more refreshed, but Doc didn't seem near ready to get up yet. So, I curled more closely around him and we both slept for another hour and a half.

When we'd both come fully awake, I asked Doc what time it was. "5:00," he told me.

"Mmmmm," I responded, still a bit sleepy. "We should either get up or have sex," I told him.

"Or both," he replied.

I was game!

We began to kiss and touch, both moving to take off our clothes. I tried to roll out of the side of the bed only to run into two cats and had to make a fast re-route to the end of the bed. Naked in bed again, we continued to kiss and touch.

"Would you like to try spanking again?" Doc asked me.

"Yes, please!" I almost squealed in delight.

While Doc had been out of town, I'd sent him an email about the Rule of Three. The important parts read as follows:

...I had a really distinct orgasm that got me thinking about the Rule of Three. I realized this is kind of a consistent pattern in my life. I'm a little sad right now that you're unfamiliar with Gilmore Girls. There are things about the series which are super problematic for me, but they come up so rarely. I digress.

Anyway, there is an awesome scene about the Rule of Three. So, here's an exchange between one of the main characters, Lorelai, and her mother, Emily at a soup tasting:

LORELAI: Haven’t you already tasted that one, Mom?

EMILY: Mm.

LORELAI: Twice, you’ve tasted that soup twice.

EMILY: You’re keeping a running count?

LORELAI: I’m morbidly fascinated.

EMILY: Well, Lorelai, when you’re tasting anything, the first taste acclimates the palate, the second establishes the foundation, and the third is to make your decision.

I think much of any experience for me is like this. It was that way with the cunnilingus. It felt good at first and then amazing, but there was all this stuff going on in my head that I explained after, and all these new sensations going on that I couldn't differentiate and was just....a lot.

Then, the second time, I asked, and I knew there would be less in my head and it felt so amazing (really, there needs to be a better word, but I can't come up with one), but it was all still just so new and I wanted to move, but I was afraid to because doing so might make it feel less good and I didn't want it to stop.

The third time I had to move my hips because I just couldn't stop myself and then HOLY MONKEYS!

So, I think the whole BDSM thing will probably be similar.

I know I got very, very, very quiet. I was acclimating my palate, as it were. What I felt when you spanked me was good. It was very good. I needed to process what was happening. When and how you spanked me; which strikes were stingy (good) and which were thuddy (good); left cheek vs right cheek; bending over the bed and if something else might be preferably - OTK perhaps? because that would be HOT; it felt good, but it was our first time so asking for more might be a stretch; we hadn't done much in the way of negotiations prior....

When we talked a bit about it the next morning, you mentioned me being quiet. I know I'm pretty responsive and verbal in other experiences, but this is so new, it's just taking me a bit to process. So, I might be really quiet again next time, as we "establish the foundation."

Please do NOT worry about going too far or doing too much. Please feel complete freedom to press into the experience and do as much as you feel comfortable and safe doing. This is what safe words are for! I'm not a fan of coded safe words, because it's one more thing to remember and keep track of.

Much like the first night we had sex, if it's too much, I'll ask you to pause. If I need it to stop, I'll say so. If I need us to change things up in intensity, I'll be clear about that. I will say, "Wait" or "Stop" or "I need ...." I won't yell out "Banana" because even though I hate them and have no reason to talk about them otherwise, bananas aren't what I want to be thinking about when you're doing all sorts of really lovely things to me.

If I'm completely silent, it's absolutely acceptable for you to check-in. I also want you to have confidence that if I'm silent, I'm okay with what you're doing. I WILL speak up if it starts to feel not okay. Eventually, I'll speak up if I need more intensity. Best to take those things slow, though.

So, when Doc offered spanking (Thank you, GOD!) I was definitely in, because I felt confident in my ability to receive what he was offering me and confident that we'd be able to communicate adequately during the experience.

I asked Doc how he wanted me, at first lying on my stomach as Doc spanked me; eventually he asked me to stand, bending over the end of the bed while he spanked me. I told him explicitly what felt good, what I wanted more of, when his strikes were exactly right.

Then, he touched. Doc began to gently stroke my cunt with his other hand, slipping a finger in me. "That's unfair," I whimpered with intense pleasure.

"Unfair?" Doc asked.

"It just all feels so good," I told him, desperate for him to continue.

And he did continue, fingering my clit and penetrating my cunt in turn, spanking me all the while. "I love feeling how wet you are," Doc said to me.

"That's what you do to me," I told him breathlessly.

Then, Doc was in me, "Fuck, yes," he moaned softly. Then he fucked me. He fucked me and he spanked me and I couldn't even begin to think as complete bliss filled me.

Later, Doc apologized. "I'm sorry," he said. "I just had to take you. It was so clear you were enjoying yourself and I had to be in you." No apology needed! Even now my brains goes blissfully silent when I remember what he did to me.

Then, Doc made me dinner. Tilapia and broccoli. God, my taste buds are happy!

Doc offered me wine, which I accepted. He refilled my glass in tandem with his own. Doc introduced me to Kir Royale. Tasty. Champagne and Creme de Cassis. It was quite tasty.

After this glass, however, Doc indicated he thought he'd perhaps fed me too much booze. He sent me to the couch while he cleaned up a few things. I plopped face down into the pillows, on my knees, ass in the air, delightfully comfortable. Doc joined me shortly thereafter, took one look at me, and declared with absolute certainty, "I've definitely given you too much to drink!"

Once he settled into his corner of the couch, I snuggled against him and we watched tv for a bit.

After an episode of Last Week's News Tonight and a bit of Buffy, we headed to bed. Doc was exhausted and knowing this, I didn't want to wear him out too much. However, earlier he had offered to masturbate me and I was more than willing to take him up on that offer!

Lying in bed, Doc beside me, we kissed. I touched his chest, his arms, his face. Doc began to stroke my pussy again. I moaned in pleasure. It was so good I knew it wouldn't take much for me to cum and I began to move my hips, melting into his touch and the building intensity.

Then, Doc said, "I'd like to try something."

I was on my back, Doc on his side next to me. My legs spread, my left one was out to the side, and my right leg was casually thrown over Doc's. In this position, he entered me, reaching around to help guide his cock into me. I thought I was going to explode with pleasure.

Immediately, I reached between my legs and began to stroke my clit in time with Doc's strokes. My orgasm built and exploded in me. I came so hard I couldn't think of anything and my whole body quivered with the intensity of the pleasure. "I love feeling you cum on my cock," Doc told me. I love it when he tells me these things.

Eventually we fell asleep. We slept in quite late this morning, but when we were both awake, we had sex again, Doc fucking me slowly, face to face. I wanted more and asked if he'd like me to change positions. He took me from behind again, and it was wonderful.

Showered and breakfasted, I headed to church. Which was amazing.

I've found a community in the midst of this place I consider exile. I have found a spiritual home, at least for the next bit of time. I have found a place where I know I will fit and where my skills and abilities and what I have to offer will be accepted.

I am happy and fulfilled.